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Sim Tester

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Dec 30 2017, 02:49 PM
Continuing from where we left off for our mock draft in S30 we have picks #11-20 in round 1. Because we have 20 teams. Damn straight.

#11 The Raleigh Reign led by GM Shaka select corner Nick P. Yerno. With an already strong secondary this is a questionable move by some, but given Shaka's extensive knowledge of the DDSPF22 sim engine we imagine that he intends to exploit a wrinkle in the software to use Yerno's talent and speed to put together another strong season.

#12 The Seoul Kpoppers's and their GM Deathonreddit had a stellar performance in season 29. But with an aging team they are looking for some new young talent to help secure a stronger future. For that the Kpop have elected to draft up-and-coming running back Zeke Cardinal. Although there are some questions about his work ethic and dedication Cardinal could prove to be a great person to inject some life into this team.

#13 The Tulsa Tornadoes GM and QB Sole Tyler knows what he needs to improve on season 29 and that is a receiver. Look no further than Flogn Joggity. Although not the best wide receiver in this draft class at pick #13 he would be an excellent addition to their air raid offense as he takes the top off the defense on deep routes.

#14 The West Virginia Singletooths surpassed everybody's expectations immediately after the S27 expansion. With their careful selection of inactive players nobody wanted that immediately became active again, GM RavensFanFromNorthNewYork fielded a very strong team. At #14 they will go with the young and unknown defensive end Rozar Umre. Although his questionable graphics talent isn't a bright spot, he certainly shows a level of work ethic we haven't seen in awhile.

#15 Everybody will be shocked when the Vienna Sausages manage to land a huge steal at #15 when fullback Warren Haulwood falls this far down the draft. Sure he isn't a position of high demand and his stats were horrendous during his tenure in the DSFL, but he is clearly a hard worker and his media will keep your team members bank accounts full all season.

#16 The Montreal Multis' GM Justanother O'sullivan make a questionable pick here at #16 by selecting automatic's recreate Hafthor Bjornsson. Given his vocal declaration to hold out if not selected by the the Wraiths in round 11 one wonders if they intend to trade him to his preferred destination or risk a long season without him. If they can turn this pick into some value it is likely a big winner.

#17 Jersey Jabronis GM and NSFLPA Founder/CEO/President/Chairman Destroyer and his player Rashad Isaiah go with a home run pick at #17 and target pocket passer quarterback Wundee Teektaktow. A great fit for their offense the young cherokee can expect to start from the first game of season 30 to replace retired quarterback Sean Rantin.

#18 The Alabama Uncledaddies go BPA here as GM adam2552 selects the relatively new yet promising reddit recruit Sherlock Holmes. With his excellent media pieces posted and exquisite eye for graphics as the leagues head grader he shows a lot of promise for the future, if only he could remember to log in.

#19 Memphis Barbecutioners' GM kckolbe had a few high profile retirements in S29 that he needs to fill. After losing Franklin Harris V we expect him to go safety here and select Null Holysquall. The self-described "fastest safety in the DSFL" would be an ideal candidate here.

#20 The Tijuana Luchadores and GM cosbornballboy have been an absolutely unstoppable franchise since they moved up from the DSFL in S26. After their fourth consecutive Ultimus title they again make an expert move in the draft by selecting another weapon for QB Askins and draft possession tight end Bill Rock to further prove that he is the greatest GM in the NSFL.

Dec 30 2017, 12:35 PM
Here we go folks, in an effort to provide more and more useless media for the league and stimulate unintelligent conversation around things that are highly unlike to happen I present to you the season 30 mock draft.

Round 1

1: Colorado Yeti: After yet another worst in the league performance the Yeti end up picking #1 overall. The only team to have never won a championship and continually seems to be losing talent they have become the Browns of the league. The Yeti led by GMs run_cmc and totally_not_noble opt to select promising young player Derek Bigblack managed by the infamous Bzerkap. The defensive end who shredded the DSFL playing for the Saskatoon Nobles is easily the best player in the league and likely will never live up to expectations on the Yeti.

2: Dublin Doubleshots: GMs Dermot and jkortesi have built an absolutely horrible franchise out of S15s expansion team. Having never posted a record better than 5-11 we constantly wonder if they will ever get their act together. But with the selection of Turk Turkleton Jr we can expect they probably won't. Sure the first Turkleton lasted 30 seasons, but already having a probowl kicker on their roster this selection makes no sense, like everything Dermot does.

3: London Legion: The Legion have been one wild roller coaster ride ever since entering the league. Having won 5 titles during their tenure they once again find themselves in a rebuild for S30 and are looking to add more talent. With GM loco's selection of DSFL quarterback standout Bradley Eastfield we're expecting this rebuild is off to a good start.

4: Philadelphia Anarchy (via Arizona Outlaws): Trading up to #4 overall GM pdxballer of the Anarchy is clearly looking to draft stud running back Meg Rackworthy. The first female running back in the league Jiggly_333 is continuing on his trend to diversify the player base. The speed back posted an incredible 4.5 YPC in the DSFL and will be a cornerstone of the offense.

5: Orange County, FL Otters: Otters GM redcyandrth is always one who looks to build a strong defense through the draft. He will very likely select star cornerback Tyke Hoss. The 230 TPE prospect comes with some personality questions and dropped to #5 in the draft because of it, but with the Otters strong locker room if anybody can turn him around, they can.

6: Mare Serenitatis Wraiths: Since relocating to the lunar surface the Wraiths have struggled to bring back the success found during the dynasty of the 20s. New GM 7Hawk will likely go for blocking tight end and reddit recruit Johnny Chimpo to help bolster their power run offense.

7: Arizona Outlaws (via Anarchy): The Outlaws will likely continue to go for a defensive player for the 10th draft in a row and are going to select the safety out of the Chicago Chicanos Winnebago Wozy. A perfect fit given their weak secondary he will be an impact player from day 1.

8: San Jose Thundercats: GM Muford put together one hell of a team for season 29 with their incredible free agency. Their performance in the regular season with a 12-4 record was one for the ages. Unfortunately going one-and-done in the playoffs they still have some holes to fill and will look to star linebacker Christopher Zoros to help their defense that struggled against the run last season.

9: Baltimore Hawks: GM Hendrix, the leagues longest reigning GM, always seems to field a great team and bring home excellent draftees. At this spot it's tough to decide which of several players would be the best choice given the team has so few holes in its roster. I think they go with speed receiver Commandre Eclair. Although they already have a stacked offense he could provide a great option in 3WR sets.

10: Charleston Ironclads: GM Timeconsumer is always hard to predict. With his habit of drafting a player and immediately position changing them to something else you never know what to expect in a draft. I think the best and most versatile player available is linebacker Bicuspid Rifle, but don't be surprised to see him position change to long snapper.

Dec 30 2017, 11:34 AM
In response to the common practice of releasing power rankings during the season in question I have decided to take it one step further and create a power ranking for one full season in the future. Let's take a look at current teams and see where they will stand 8 weeks from now as season 6 starts to roll in. Reminder: these are not rankings for season 5!

1: Yellowknife Wraiths
After their second defeat to the Otters in the Ultimus during season 5 the Wraiths limped home to the north pole in an attempt to build on their strong season 5 performance. However with the return of suspended lineman Jayce Tuck they are poised more than ever to defeat the reigning champs in Orange County and bring back the trophy for their Eskimo brothers.

2: Orange County Otters
After winning their second consecutive Ultimus title during season five in a close game vs the Yellowknife Wraiths the Otters go into the following offseason looking to add more talent and build around their core to create the dynasty. However with the Otter trade tax at it's highest level of all time they struggle to add the talent they are looking for without completely destroying their future draft capital. It will take a bit of luck to challenge the Wraiths in season 6.

3: Philadelphia Liberty
After finishing season 5 with a 7-7 record and missing the playoffs the Liberty used the offseason to further re-tool their offense to finally make a push for a win. They ditched quarterback Rove and traded for Stone hoping to give their offense some spark. The offensive line finally looks like it isn't made of paper mache. And the defense is as strong as ever.

4: Baltimore Hawks
The perennial head-scratching team seems like it again could not get it's act together in season 5's postseason. After surrounding Blocksdale with receiving talent and going 9-5 they still were not able to finish the season the way they wanted to. And with several key players walking in free agency they find themselves behind the eight ball in a very strong conference attempting to go the distance again.

5: San Jose Sabercats
On the tail end of a 7-7 record in season 5 and a one-and-done showing in the playoffs the Sabercats did not have a great draft or free agency period. They look like they will once more struggle to defeat the Otters in Orange County for the season 6 playoffs. Although there are some very talented members on this squad, the liability of Chris Orosz's questionable work ethic seems to be holding their offense back.

6: Arizona Outlaws
Finishing last season with only 5 wins the Outlaws have fallen on hard times from only 2 seasons ago. The loss of the army of Er has hit the team hard on all sides of the ball. They have some good looking young players with Browning, Goodson, Lattimore, and such. But it will take another season or two for them to build on the young core of the team to develop into a contender once again.

7. Colorado Yeti
After a great draft and offseason in season 5 the Yeti got pounded in the regular season once again and only finished 2-12. Near the end of the season they finally got quarterback Pierno to shut up and pay attention with his archetype switch to Gunslinger and the team immediately started performing better. With young players like Crush and Bly making a big impact early on and having a great showing in the season 6 draft the Yeti are looking more like a 4 or 5 win team this season.

8. Las Vegas Legion
One game. The Legion only won one game in season 5. And this season appears to be even worse with their retirees all gone. Sure, there's some good looking talent to build on. And quarterback whatever Bovo's name is looks to be the future. But they still need several strong drafts and free agents before they have a chance of competing. Season 8. Season 8 looks like a good target.

Dec 21 2017, 09:30 AM
After the conclusion of two great drafts for both the NSFL and DSFL I thought I would take a moment to share some of my thoughts and scouting notes I had for each of the NSFL draftees that I looked at for the S5 season. I'm not going to be sharing my board or the PMs we exchanged, but there is plenty of good stuff in there

Since the Otters only had 2 picks and both were in round 1 we didn't scout very deep, only about 2 rounds worth. And since I transitioned into a new job IRL during all this I didn't have much time to scout very deep anyway.

Some people I knew we wouldn't be drafting anyway, so I didn't even bother PMing them, keep that in mind. And I wrote this quick so there's probably errors, deal with it.

I have these guys in tiers but within each tier there is no particular order.

Tier 1 Prospects

Carlito Crush - Balanced TE. This guy shot up my draft board after receiving his PMs. We all knew he was a hard working player with unlimited potential, but by his responses to my questions you could tell he was just a cool guy that would be easy to get along with and good to talk with in the LR. I knew we wouldn't have a shot at him drafting #7 but the Yeti definitely scored a good one here. I expect he will entertain the idea of switching to a pure WR soon.

Cameron Taylor - All-Around Safety. This is a guy who was always high on my draft board, even before he responded to my scouting message. He put in the work, he had a good build and a very nice choice of position and archetype. This was the kind of player the Otters like, someone who could easily be molded into the system they run on defense. Sadly, I also figured he wouldn't make it to us, but I had to at least put in the work and message him in case.

John Wachter - Possession WR. Okay, so I'll admit I kind of hyped up that the Otters were going to be drafting him at #5 (before we traded down) just to annoy the rest of the league. The Otters with two of the best receivers already taking a third superstar? Yeah, that would have ruffled some feathers. But again I figured he wouldn't make it to us, especially after we traded to #7. Still I really loved his response to my scouting PM and he seemed like another awesome guy who would be a great teammate.

Andre Bly Jr. - Considering he was selected as a GM we knew this wasn't happening so I didn't really scout him or PM him. But he was obviously a top-tier prospect.

Tier 2 Prospects

Ryan Sierra - OL. Here was a guy I unfortunately didn't get off a scouting message to until very late. Well, really I didn't get off my scouting messages to most guys until very late. I'm a busy man these days. And he didn't respond for a few days until the morning of the draft. But an exchange of a couple of PMs was enough for me to realize that 1) He was a nice guy and seemed smart and 2) would be willing to swap out of OL and into something like DL. Done. Solid dude and really happy to have him as an Otter.

Michael Tillman - Playmaker Safety. I really liked this guy a lot. Passing on him with our two picks was a hard, hard decision. We had exchanged PMs and talked about moving positions to something else, how he could fit on our team, etc. I messaged his old DSFL GM to get a little more insight on him. He was one of the faster players in the league, he's well spoken, he does graphics work. Really a top-tier prospect that shouldn't have made it out of round 1.

Tegan Atwell - Man-to-Man Corner. I mean, it's Jiggly. We've been teammates since the very beginning. Sure he can be lax and skip PTs and such, but he has shown the Otters a lot of loyalty and I feel that loyalty should be met in kind. So we couldn't leave our friend hung out to dry here. We just have to keep on him about doing the PTs and we're set for many more years of fun and championships. I love Tegan's build too, it works.

Gregory Fletcher - Man-to-Man corner. I like this guy a lot too. Another draftee from the Marshals who I had talked to their GM about. But I had a feeling he wouldn't escape the Hawks in round 1 and make it to us. I liked his responses, he seemed interested and engaged, and his build was definitely something we could work with.

Dean Jackson - Kicker of some type. Another player I didn't scout. Even though he is a Turk Turkleton level kicker the Otters have Madlad who is active enough for our needs. We might have drafted him if there were no tier 2 players left somehow, but only to trade him. A good pickup for the Outlaws.

Tier 3

Fresh Booter - Red Zone WR. Everybody knows Booter. I had talked with him plenty in the past so my scouting messages with him were pretty brief and to the point. He would have filled a nice niche for us, but we also knew what his activity level was going to be which we felt just wasn't quite round 1 material. Still, a good guy who will fill a great role as a TE/WR for his team for many seasons.

Conall O'Sullivan - Receiving Back. Apparently everyone thought the Otters we gunning for the O'Sullivan trifecta and were going to draft Kristy95 round 1. But I honestly didn't even message her - to be fair her sister Juosu kind of answered all my questions. I liked K95 but it just wasn't a great fit for our offense so we figured we'd do better looking elsewhere. Still a great steal where she was drafted and fell too far.

Terrell Brister - Man-to-Man corner. I didn't really scout him much either. We knew he was LVL's co-GM so what's the point. I like Tbone though and I hope he brings some spark to the Legion.

Tier 4

Egor Medved - Nose Tackle. He never answered my PMs. And that's fine, he wasn't high on my board anyway. He's a minimum activity player with just activity checks. 16 TPE a season is better than nothing, but not worth drafting at #7 or #8. I hope his activity levels improve as he could be a good addition to a league starving for more DTs.

Darren Morris - Playmaker Safety. He started out at around #2 on my draft board and fell so far. I liked Roly and I don't know if being simmer burned him out or what. But it's sad to see him go inactive. I hope he comes back, was a good member in the league.

Tier 5

Peg Leg - Kicker. Didn't scout him. Was at least active until end of regular season unlike most of the rest of this list.

Wolverine Justice - Pocket Passer QB. Didn't scout him. Retired anyway.

Isaac Brown - QB. Didn't scout him. Looks like a good pick.

Jacob Lattimore - Safety. Didn't scout him, he looked inactive. Glad to see he came back after the draft. Good pick by Outlaws.

Bastian Barnhart - DE. Messaged him a while back as he was someone I had my eye on all during the regular season, but unfortunately he had gone inactive a few days before that. It's too bad, he had potential to be a round 1 pick.

Kenny Omega - WR. Another guy I didn't scout due to inactivity.

And that's it. That's my thoughts on most of the active draftees from the S5 NSFL draft and who the Otters wanted. Sure we didn't get any of our 1st tier prospects but picking at 7 and 8 that's no surprise. I'm still very happy with having Jiggly and Battleborn and wouldn't change a thing. I also think after talking to some of these draftees that the league landed a bunch of good people who I look forward to playing with and against for many more seasons.

Dec 9 2017, 06:42 PM
As many of you already know tomorrow is the beginning of free agency. Although not as high-profile as last season's free agency period there will still be a number of very talented players hitting the streets looking for a big payoff or looking to find a great locker room and team. For those of you that are going to be looking to find their value on the open market I would like to share some things about the Orange County Otters organization.

1) Talent. The Otters have always been a talented squad. We have a number of highly active players like myself, Mike Boss, Bradley Westfield, Ian Bavitz, Julian O'Sullivan, Marc Spector, and Robert Phelps. The Otters are designed top to bottom to win games. We won the championship based on hard work and sound analytics. We want to do it again.

2) Maturity. Most of our members are all around 28-34 years old. That doesn't mean we don't have room for young players, or that they won't fit in. It just means that we are a team that takes the game seriously while also understanding that it is just a game, and people need to keep it light and have fun. We understand when work, kids, school, whatever it is gets in the way. We find ways to support each other and help our teammates succeed in the game while still prioritizing their real life. And we like a fun and sometimes a little trolly LR, but we don't tolerate people who are LR cancer.

3) Flexibility. The Otters have always been flexible when it comes to how we design our depth charts. We find a way to make sure our players get playing time and succeed even if it doesn't make much sense on paper. We were one of the first teams to start a safety at linebacker with Dominic Verns, and we made it work damn well. We happily let our pro-bowl DT transfer to LB because he wasn't having fun at DT anymore, we found a way to make it work. Don't be concerned about our roster and us not having room for you, we can make it work.

4) Loyalty. We firmly believe in drafting the best players and keeping them. The Otters usually don't trade players unless we truly believe that it is not only in the best interest of the Otters, but also in the best interest of the player. We have only made 2 trades ever. Once was Ethan Hunt (Gosh Jarden) who was not going to get playing time behind Mike Boss, so we sent him to a team where he could be a starting QB. The other was Waters who we knew was friends with loco and would be happier in the Las Vegas locker room.

5) Availability. Our front office leadership team is always there. Myself, Molarpistols, and Juosu are always ready and willing to talk strategy, builds, future games, free agents, trades, whatever. If someone shows an interest in taking on more responsibility we will happily allow them to join our front office staff and start learning more about managing the team.

Now that we've discussed the Otters and our culture and our philosophy I'd like to talk a bit about what we're looking for.

1) Activity. We want actives. Obviously the more you earn the better price you command. We're definitely willing to pick up low-activity free agents (see: Durden), but the salary would match the activity. If you're a top earner, we want you.

2) Personality. If you're a dick, we don't want you. A smattering of dickish qualities is fine (I mean, look at Clegane and myself). But really we're looking for intelligent, engaging, and overall good people for our locker room. We want someone who can hang out on our discord with us and talk about food, beer, football, music, movies, whatever. We want good people.

3) Positions. As stated above we will take just about any position out there. We firmly believe in bringing the person not the position. That being said, there are a few positions that we have a bigger need for. Defensive lineman (any type) is probably our #1 need right now. So if you like the idea of position switching to defensive lineman and want to be top of our depth chart please reach out to me at the beginning of free agency. We also have a big opening for running back. But really, we want anyone that we think embodies the Otter culture.

So, if what you read above sounds like something that matches both what you're looking for and what you can offer, than Orange County might be the place for you. I can't guarantee we can get you a ring in S5, there's a ton of great teams out there. But I can guarantee we will give it one hell of a shot. Hope to hear from some of you guys soon.

Otter Slaughter

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